Doctor Visit

Today, I went to the doctor, and in the last 6 weeks I've gained 3lbs. :/ Not the greatest of news, however, my blood pressure was still normal. I think I'm going to start going to weight watchers again. I did it about two years ago, and it worked for a little bit, maybe the new plan could help me out again. I've also chosen to go back to counseling. The issues with my depression, anxiety, etc are still somewhat in my life, and they need to be addressed. I feel like I'm on the start of a whole new journey. :) ...hopefully this time with a happy ending.

Today is MINE

This morning I woke up with the greatest epiphany I've ever had! The moment I opened my eyes, the first thought I had was "I need to love myself again." I mean seriously! I used to act so confident and happy with who I am, and this past year has been the complete opposite. I've become the depressed, obese, heartbroken, less confident, fast food junkie. The problems of my world had caught up to me and I have let my self go beyond belief. I always seem to say "I'll just diet" or "I'll ride my bike today", and come to everyone's surprise, I fall through with my goals. I've lost up to 65lbs at one point in time! 65lbs!!!!! That was the greatest feeling in my entire life! I felt amazing! Smaller jeans were fitting me! My asthma was almost extinct! High blood pressure was OLD news! I was on the path of good health for once in my life! Friends and family would approach me and tell me how I was inspiring them to do the same! I was inspiring people?! People were being helped by me!? WOW! This is when I loved myself. And I mean that. I was so confident and proud. Sure, I was STILL obese, but I was determined to change my life, and for once I was happy!
I want this feeling back more than anything in the world. I need my health back. I want to be able to have children and teach them my ways of health and well-being. I never want my future children to grow up obese, like I did. My whole life lies ahead of me, and I need to take it by the horns and make it MINE! I've decided to apply to be on THE BIGGEST LOSER. I've looked into the whole process of how to apply, terms and conditions, etc. This show could seriously save my life. I feel like I have the drive, the will-power, and the attitude to make this happen. The Biggest Loser has the means that I do not have. Just the thought of how much the contestants and the trainers on this show can TEACH me is overwhelming, and I hope and pray that someday I could have the opportunity to experience it, and better my health, my body, and my entire life. :) I'll be applying for season 8 of The Biggest Loser, and will keep everyone up to date with how I'm doing with this entire process! I'm more than excited to start this, and want to thank everyone who will be supporting me! :)